Thursday, April 25, 2013

why ambulance is WHITE

Question:" Why AMBULANCE is WHITE in color ?? (15 marks)


Ans:" AMBULANCE has OXYGEN cylinder,


Oxygen is a gas,


Tuesday, April 23, 2013

What is Attachment

attachmentAttachment is not when two people chat Day
Night
.
.

Monday, April 22, 2013

Jab paper dekh key sir Chakraaye

exam-paperJab paper dekh key sir Chakraaye

Kuchh samajh mein na aaye
Idhar Udhar dekhney par bhi

Me and my boss

me-and-my-bossME and MY BOSS !!

When I Take a long time to finish,
I Am Slow,
When my boss takes a long time,
He Is Thorough

KUTTE K BACHE OXYGEN KE PIPE SE PAIR UTHA

hospitalA Chini was in hospital.
SANTA went to meet him.

Chini said 'CHING CHONG, MOU.CHU CHA' And died.

Saturday, April 20, 2013

Arrey, conductor kidhar gaya, 2 rupay lene the

Girlfriend : "Last night I had a dream of you."
bus-conductor

bf. (got excited): "Maine kya kiya tumhare sapne mein aa ke"

Ajab Prem ki Gajab Kahani

ajab-prem-ki-gajab-kahaniA pig fell in love with a chicken n they both kissed each other..
next day..pig died of bird flu n chicken died of swine flu..

Ajab Prem ki Gajab Kahani

Entire water of a sea cannot sink a ship

Entire water of a sea can't sink a ship until it get inside the sea, negativity of the world can't put u
entire-water-of-a-sea-cannot-sink-of-a-ship
down unless u allow it to get inside u

Do not read success stories

Don't read success stories you will only get a message, always read failure stories you will get an idea
success-stories
to get success. 

Solve all your problems

Don't look for someone who will solve all your problems. look for someone who won't let you face
solve-problem
them alone.

Opps I am still unmarried

Opps I am still unmarried..

opps I am still unmarried

First physics law of cartoons

First physics law of cartoons

First law of physics

Do not care a person who care about you

U always run behind a person who don't cares about you, but you don't care about a person who cares
do-not-care-a-person-who-care-about-u
about you.. why?

Insaan vo hai jo

Insaan vo hai jo gir ke bhi uth jaye, vo nhi jo ek baar girne ke baad chalne ki himmat hi na kar page
insaan

Words are not Enough

words-are-not-enoughWords may not be enough to explain how you feel and what makes you upset, eyes also plays an
important role in understanding the same.

Be careful with your words

The tongue has no bones, but is strong enough to break heart,
words
So be careful with your Words

Friday, April 19, 2013

Ultimate English by punjabi

Ultimate English by Punjabi


ultimate english by punjabi

Be careful with your words

The tongue has no bones, but is strong enough to break heart,
tongue-has-no-bones
So be careful with your Words

Wednesday, April 17, 2013

Income in Different Profession

Comparison of 10 Year's Average
highly-paid-sanyasi
Income in Different Profession...
.
.
Teacher: 25 Lakh.

Doctor: 50 Lakh.
Engineer: 45 Lakh.
IAS Officer: 70 Lakh.
Politician: 300 Crore.
Baba: 500 Crore.
Sanyasi : 1177Crore.
.
.
.
.
"SO, CHOOSE YOUR CAREER CAREFULLY!"
..
Chhodo Ghar Baar,
Chalo Haridwaar!
High Profile Job Hai, Yaar! :D

Difference between Himami and Tsunami

Teacher: What is the difference between Himami and Tsunami...
difference-between-himami-tsunami
Tinto: Himami is face wash... Tsunami is is total wash

Bhagwan and Doctor ko kabhi naraj nahi karna chahiye

Bhagwan & Doctor ko kabhi naraj nahi karna chahiye
Bhagwan & Doctor ko kabhi naraj nahi karna chahiye
Bhagwan naraj, aap doctor ke pass
aur

Choti-Choti magar Moti batein

Choti-Choti magar Moti batein:
Choti-Choti magar Moti batein
1 bat zindagi mein hamesha yaad rakhna
"Jab hawa chalti hai to pattay hilte hain
aur

Monday, April 15, 2013

Stupid boss and stupid employee

Stupid boss and stupid employee

office

Kya aapke paste me namak hai

Kya aapke paste me namak hai

paste me namak

Thursday, April 11, 2013

Biggest Tragedy in love story

Biggest-tragedy-in-love-storyEk Luv Story:

1 ladka 1 ladki ko bhut pyar krta tha, lekin darr ki vajah se kch keh nai paya..

1 din usne decide kiya ki wo us ladki ko msg karke I luv u bolega,

Usne raat mein 'I LUV U' type kr k ladki k no par send kiya aur so gya.

Are you bored

Are you bored!!
are you bored




I like boora in food

I-like-boora-in-foodbura mat dekho,
bura mat bolo,
bura mat suno
.
.

Miss out life big prizes

childish bt awesome uncountable memoriesMost of us miss out life's big prizes:
Nobel... :O
Oscar... :(
Grammy... :'(
Degrees..

Kambaqt salary dekh ke khayalat badal jate hai

kambaqt-salary-dekh-ke-khayalat-badal-jate-haiumar ki raah me jazbaat badal jate hai
waqt ki andhi mein halaat badaal jate hai
sochta hu kaam kar kar ke records tod du
lekin kambaqt salary dekh ke khayalat badal jate hai !!!

Uff ye reservation

Uff ye reservation
uff ye reservation

Tuesday, April 9, 2013

Evolution of men women

Evolution of men and women
evolution of men and women

Beware of Owner

Beware of Owner!!

beware of owner

roothane ki aadat nahi rahi

Sapno se dil lagane ki aadat nahi rahi,
Har wakt muskurane ki
Aadat nhi rahee.

Saturday, April 6, 2013

Funny meaning of twitter

Meaning of twitter :

T :This

W: Wow

I: Internet

T: Tool

T: That

E :Eventually

R :Ruined Your Life.

Do not think that I am stupid

Don't think that I am stupid and don’t understand anything!!! I am just lazy to show how smart I am..

Freak storm is dangerous

Freak storm is dangerous!! But a freak person is not.. that person is mentally ill, so show some sympathy to that person

I'm not shy

I'm not shy. I'm just very good at figuring out who's worth talking to..

not funny at all

If are not making me laugh, it means you are not funny at all.. so don't care what other says about you!!

Women will never be as successful as men

Women will never be as successful as men because they have no wives to advise them

Being rude don't mean you are honest

If you are rude than it don't mean that you are honest, but if you are honest than sometimes you sound like a rude person..

Cute love

Cute love is when your friend gets angry with u n says, I will never talk 2 u.
And later
that person comes back 2 u just 2 inform.. i am still angry ;-)

Thursday, April 4, 2013

Munni badman ho gyi, Sheela jwan ho gyi or bubbly

kabhi jha bharat me ladies sati savitri kehlati thi.. vhi aaj Munni badman ho gyi, Sheela jwan ho gyi or bubbly badmash ho gyi.. :O

Rabb hi janne aage aage kya hoga!!

Wednesday, April 3, 2013

Summer’s Ultimate

Summer’s Ultimate:
Mummy dialogue
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
Kambakhto thanda pani pite ho to bottle bhi bhar ke rakha kro

How time has changed

How time has changed. .

Now 10-year-old kid cry because they breakup with there Bf's/gfs . . . .

.

A Letter from an Indian Girl to Indian Media on Sanjay Dutt issue

A Letter from an Indian Girl to Indian Media on Sanjay Dutt issue:
------------------------------------------------------
Dear Media,

Please do not make Sanjay Dutt a National Hero. He possessed 10s of Arms and hand grenades that Indian citizens are not supposed to. It goes beyond my imagination (should have) that if anyone need to keep 10s of AK-47 rifles and Hand-Grenade bombs for self-protection that too in India. Please Indian media do not make a saint out of a criminal, even though he is a celebrity.

Monday, April 1, 2013

Golden Words By Hitler

Golden Words By Hitler:
If u cant fly, run
if u cant run, walk
if u cant walk, crawl

km se km ek call to kr hi leni chahiye thi

1 ladke ki engagemnt 1 bahut
Khubsurat Ldki se hui.
Wo Ladka us ladki se kbi nhi mila tha.

Baaki sbko thund lagti hai

Only 3 living beings are immune to cold.
1.Polar bears
2.Penguins

Girls Eyes are the Most Beautiful

She Says: "I don't Love you.."
Her Eyes Say: "I'm Crazy for you.."

She Says: "I'm Happy without you.."
... Her Eyes Say: "I'm No where without you.."

Superb Attitude for Life

Superb Attitude for Life-
.

.

A New Metal is added to the Chemistry

A New Metal is added to the Chemistry:

Name: Wife
Symbol: Bv
Atomic Weight: Don't even dare to ask!

Rishte tod deti hai GF

Rishte tod deti hai GF
Insan ko tanha kr deti hai GF

Na aane dena dil k paas kbi inko

we are intelligent

we are intelligent
we are intelligent


Samajh lena us din APRIL FOOL hai

In hasino se Rasme Wafa
or Dil Lagana sarasar bhool hai
Jis din ye ikrar karen mohabbat ka
Samajh lena us din APRIL FOOL hai

Exercise is good for everyone

Exercise is good for everyone
exercise for everyone

What makeup do you use??

What makeup do you use??
what makeup to use

Pagal Hai Wo Log Jo 14 Feb Ko Propose Karte Hai

Pagal Hai Wo Log Jo 14 Feb Ko Propose Karte Hai .
.
.
.
.
. .
.
.
.
.

Thursday, March 28, 2013

BE BRAVE and Hopeful U WIN

I asked God 2 keep 'U n your family' happy.
He said -' Ok, Only for 4 days.
Wisdom of words!I said ok, summer,winter, rainy n spring days.
He said-No.only for 3 days.

Status me chahe kuch bhi likho sab bde maze se pdte h,wo b puri tone ksath

Papa laye motor car
us k niche phiye 4
po po krti
age chlti
sidhe chlti

Muslim Girl exam mein hindu ladke se

Ek Muslim Girl exam mein Hindu ladke se boli-
Excuse me

Psychology ka practical

Psychology ka practical ho ra tha.

Professor ne ek Chuhe k liye ek trf CAKE or dusri trf CHUHIYA rak di.

Chuha fouran Cake ki trf lapka.

Insaniyat se vishwas uta gya

Chor Aaya
Tijori par Likha tha
"Todne ki Zarurt Nhi,Button Dabao, Khul Jayega"
Button Dabate hi Police Aa gyi.

Galti apki hi hogi

If ever i was rude to u. If Ever i was angry with u. If ever i misbehaved with u..Don't hesitate.

BLAME URSLF

Galti apki hi hogi, Mai to SHONA BABU hu na!!

What is Diwali

A mom asked her elder kid to explain diwali to his brother.. He replied: "So look, this dude Ram had, like a big kingdom, & people liked him but, like his step mom or something, was kinda bitch n she forced her hubby to send this Ram to sum jungle or something.. Coz he was going for 14yrs, so his wife n bro got along (U knw just 2 chill)..

Strange but true

Strange but true-
.
Duniya me hr insaan ka alag naam h,
mgr bheed me jb hm aawaz
lgate h.
.

Monday, March 25, 2013

What is the Color of Frequency?

What is the Color of Frequency?

Ans: Purple

How?

Dedicated To All Engineering Students

Dedicated To All Engineering Students
............
just imagine u r alone in a dense forest
its night
a fearful wind blows and u find a ghostly old building there of 15 feet tall
with fearful heart u approach near the building suddenly a dead body falls on u
and a great light fills on the building then
;
;
;
;
;

Friday, March 22, 2013

bhut garmi hoti hai

DUNIA me kabhi achhe insan ki talaash me mat nikalna
,
,
kyonki
,
,
,
,

Holder mein aapko latka de

Aapki dosti ki roshni itni hai
holder
Ki
her taraf ujala hi ujala nazar aata hai

Sochte hain ki ghar ki bijli katwa de
Aur Holder mein aapko latka de

Sartaj Modified Song

sartajSartaj Modified- Asi gye gurudware te kol Car c,
othe ja k dekhya langar tyar c.

koi koi sune babbe di gall nu,
koi koi dekhe jalebiyan wal nu...

sartaj ne chuk jalebi luko layi,
babbeyan ne kutt-kutt othe hi kho layi.

Jlebi chkn te kam khrab ho gya,
fer sartaj chup chap ho gya.

JAB PYAR KIYA TO Darna kya

pyar-kiya-to-darna-kyaBoy:Kal se hum kahi Aur milnge
Girl: kyu?
Boy:Bade Zalim hai teri Gali k bache!
Girl:kyu kya hua?

Boy:Kutte piche Laga k kehte hai

JAB PYAR KIYA TO Darna kya?

When YOU love sumOne

When YOU love some One but that person doesn't love you,
love
When Some ONE Loves u ,YOU Don't love that person..

When u BOTH love each other,

Then THIRD PERSON mess up everything.. !!

Uff Meri Majburi

Kbi-Kbi lgta h ki tension me Jaan De du
uff-meri-majburi

Pr

Jeena pdta h,
jb khayal aata h ki

kuch hi to Smart or samjdaar log bache h
1 or kam ho jayega

Uff Meri Majburi

Gapp suno ji

Gapp suno ji..
gapp-suno-ji
Gapp suno ji..
Gapp suno muh add ke...!

Chuhe ne sher kutteya,
Gufa vichon kad ke...!

Ganje ne kangi kitti,
Cheer vichon kad ke...!

Murde ne photo khichwai,
muh bahar kadh ke...!

Te ik bhutni message pad rahi a
sare kam chadd ke...
Hun Haso... Dnt mind:-)

Friendship is silent gift of nature.

Friendship is the silent gift of nature..
friendship
More old..More strong..
More deep..More clear..
More close..More warm..
Fewer words..
More understanding

Alag naam par ek pehchan

Strange but true-
duniya
.
Duniya me hr insaan ka alag naam h,
mgr bheed me jb hm aawaz
lgate h.
.
.
.
.
.

"ABE O KUTTE" kasam se 20 me se 18 log palat kr dkte h

In the memory of 90s

In d memory of 90's
memory-of-90s

When d most popular games were "chuppan-chupai",
"pakdam-pakdai",
"oonch-neech",
"barf-paani",

when d best delights were "orange goli",
"raaja ka khajaana",
"kismibar",

when we were not allowed 2 watch late night movies on DD-1 but v managed it somehow,

when decision were made by "akkad bakkad bambey bow"
.
when while playing cricket, rule wer
"ghar me jana out, aur jo marega wahi lekar aayega"
.

When d best defesive dialogues were "jo kehta hai wahi hota hai",
"same 2 u, bck 2 u"
.
childish bt awesome uncountable memories...:

Thursday, March 7, 2013

Funny Love letter to Mom and Dad

mom-dadDear Mother and Dad:

It has now been three months since I left for college. I have been remiss in writing and am very sorry for my thoughtlessness in not having written before. I will bring you up to date now, but before you read on, please sit down. You are not to read any further unless you are sitting down... Okay?

Well, then, I am getting along pretty well now. The skull fracture and the concussion I got when I jumped out of the window of my dormitory when it caught fire shortly after my arrival, are pretty well healed now. I only spent two weeks in the hospital and now I can see almost normally and only get three headaches a day.

Fortunately the fire in the dormitory and my jump were witnessed by an attendant at the gas station near the dorm and he was the one who called the Fire Department and the ambulance. He also visited me at the hospital, and since I had nowhere to live because of the burnt-out dorm, he was kind enough to invite me to share his apartment with him. It's really a basement room, but it is kind of cute. He is a very fine boy and we have fallen deeply in love and are planning to get married. We haven't set the exact date yet, but it will be before my pregnancy begins to show.

Yes, Mother and Dad, I am pregnant. I know how much you are looking forward to being grandparents and I know you will welcome the baby and give it the same love and devotion and tender care you gave me when I was a child. The reason for the delay in our marriage is that my boyfriend has some minor infection which prevents us from passing our premarital blood tests and I carelessly caught it from him. This will soon clear up with the penicillin injections I am now taking daily.

I know you will welcome him into our family with open arms. He is kind and although not well-educated, he is ambitious. Although he is of a different race and religion than ours, I know you expressed tolerance will not permit you to be bothered by the fact that his skin color is somewhat darker than ours. I am sure you will love him as I do. His family background is good, too for I am told that his father is an important   in the village in Africa from which he comes.

Now that I have brought you up to date, I want to tell you that there was no dormitory fire, I did not have a concussion or skull fracture, I was not in the hospital, I am not pregnant, I am not engaged, I do not have syphilis and there is no boyfriend in my life. However, I am getting a "D" in History and an "F" in Science, and I wanted you to see these marks in the proper perspective.

Your loving daughter,

Evergreensmss

funny conversation between boy ang girl

Funny Conversation between boy and girls
phone-number

BOY : May I hold your hand?
GIRL : No thanks, it isn't heavy

GIRL : Say you love me! Say you love me!
BOY : You love me...

GIRL : If we become engaged will you give me a ring
BOY : Sure, what's your phone number??

GIRL : I think the poorest people are the happiest.
BOY : Then marry me and we'll be the happiest couple

GIRL : Darling, I want to dance like this forever.
BOY : Don't you ever want to improve

BOY : I love you and I could die for you!
GIRL : How soon??

BOY : I would go to the end of the world for you!
GIRL : Yes, but would you stay there??

Tuesday, March 5, 2013

Cute love story

cute-love-storyA cute Love Story:
GIRL:M i Pretty?
BOY:NO.
Girl:Do U wanna Love with me?
BOY:NO.
Girl:if I leave U then will u cry?
Boy:NO.
Girl got Hurt n started 2 cry.
Boy hold her Tight n said:
U r not Pretty but BEAUTIFUL.
I don't want 2 live without U but LIVE 4 U.
When u leave me i will not cry BuT DIE.

Kids Love story

A KIDs LOVE LETTER:
kids-love
.
Dear Pri...,
I love u. My dream i see U. ♥
everywhere. U know, i not live u..

I come green shirt tomorrow. U luv i, u come green frock.
I wait down mango tree.
U no come, i jump tree.
sure come.
your
MONU ♥
..
..
Now girl replies..
DEAR mONU ur letter mummy see.
Papa beat me, bahut sarra.
I royi royi.. Mummy angry. ♥ Lock me room.
i No come. No jump.
I luv u. C u another day. I no green
frock only red.

Sunday, March 3, 2013

ए खुदा

Godअजीब जहाँ है, तेरा ए मेरे खुदा
कहा तुने हूँ मैं हर जगह!
फिर दिखा क्यों मुझे कहीं नहीं
देखता तो हूँ मैं तुझे हर जगह !
ढूंढते है लोग हर पल तुझे हर जगह
मंदिर मस्जिद और न जाने कहाँ कहाँ!
पता अपना बता दे ए मेरे खुदा मुझे
एक बार ही सही मगर खुद से मिला दे मुझे!
इतनी शिफत तो मेरी दुआ मैं अदा हो
याद करू मैं तुझे और तू सामने मेरे खड़ा हो!
है नाम पे तेरे क्यों इतना कत्ले आम
क्या तुने ऐसा ही बनाया था इंसान
रूह मैं जब बस्ता है तू सबकी
तो फिर कैसे हैवान बन गया इंसान !
ए खुदा ऐसा ही जहाहं है तेरा
तो कैसा ये जहाँ है तेरा !
लगता खुद से खफा है जहाँ तेरा
तुझसे ही न जाने कैसे जुदा जहाँ है तेरा!

Letter written by an HR executive to his love

Letter written by an HR executive to his love:
love-letter

Dearest Romio,

I am very happy to inform you that I have fallen in Love with you since the 14th of October (Sunday).


With reference to the meeting held between us on the 13th of Oct. at 1500 hrs, I would like to present myself as a prospective lover.

Our love affair would be on probation for a period of three months and depending on compatibility, would be made permanent.Of course, upon completion of probation, there will be continuous on the job training and performance appraisal schemes leading up to promotion from lover to spouse.

The expenses incurred for coffee and entertainment would initially be shared equally between us. Later, based on your performance, I might take up a larger the expenses. However I am broad-minded enough to be taken care of, on your expense account.

I request you to kindly respond within 30 days of receiving this letter, failing which, this offer would be canceled without further notice and I shall be considering someone else. I would be happy, if you could forward this letter to your brother, if you do not wish to take up this offer.

Thanking you in anticipation,

Yours sincerely,

If you have been in IT industry too long these are your symptoms

If you have been in IT industry too long these are your symptoms:
IT

1.) U use phrases like “No issues” and “Value addition” in everyday parlance. For e.g. When talking about your doodhwalla, U say, “His milk does zero value addition to my health but he is the only guy around so no issues”

2.) Ur prime source of entertainment is the forwards send to U by friends whose faces U cant remember.

3.) U drink more tea or coffee than water.

4.) U keep trying to shut down ur home computer by pressing Ctrl+Alt+Del (used to lock office comps)

5.) When ur mobile rings at home, U rush outside to receive the call.

6.) When U make calls at home, U accidentally dial “0″to get an outside line.

7.) U haven’t played Solitaire with real cards in years.

8.) Ur last crush was a girl in HR, ur current crush is the new girl in HR and all ur crushes in the future will be girls in HR.

9.) U spend the entire day reading forwards, smoking cigarettes, drinking tea/coffee and playing T.T. and then complain about the late working hours.

10.) Ur important ‘meetings’ usually comprise two or three people max, including yourself.

11) U secretly prepare for CAT only to find ur PL sitting behind you at the exam.

13.) U keep pressing Ctrl+Enter wondering why your gmail is not going.

14.) U email ur mate who works at the desk next to U.

15.) As U read this list, U r thinking of sending it to ur friends who are also in IT.

16.)U r too busy to notice there was no line no. 12

17.)U r not sure so u scroll back check it .

18.)And now u r smiling!!!!

 
Google Analytics Alternative